Day 123, January 14th, 2011

ONe year today I moved to Karmiel, three years today I became an Israeli citizen, and I am just heading down. Down I have been so many times that I should have gotten used to it, but it never cease to being awful and to feeling awful and to just don't want to go to. Not a path to go but I feel all the doors are closed, slammed before my very face and feels so bad. Still waiting for the 2011 miracle to come to me cause I really don't know where to find it, to persue it to fight for, the only fights I can show off are my fights and fists an elbows to get out of circumstances me and life and others got me into, poor this destiny of mine, always fighting for personal justice for wrong doings and even if they were worth fighting for, they are no good enough, I would have preferred a life where I had made a difference for other,s for good, for justice for the sick, the sad